Tag Archives: jokes

December Joke #10

December Jokes, , , , , ,

Christmas Squirrels

Three buildings in town were overrun by squirrels—the town hall, the hardware store, and the church. The town hall brought in some cats. But after they tore up all the files, the mayor got rid of the predators, and soon the squirrels were back.

The hardware store humanely trapped the squirrels and set them free outside town. But three days later, the squirrels climbed back in.

Only the church came up with an effective solution. They baptized the squirrels and made them members. Now they see them only on Christmas and Easter.*

Did you know…that going to Heaven is not about attending a church.

Learn more about how you can have eternal life – Click HERE.

Sharing Jokes with a Purpose is a great way to share the Gospel with your friends.

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*Original Source: www.rd.com/funny-stuff/13-funny-jokes-for-the-holidays

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December Joke #9

December Jokes, , , , , , , , , , , ,

Why did the ornament leave the Christmas tree?

He got tired of just hanging around.

Some people’s goal is just to make it through another day. It’s like they’re just hanging around in life but God created you for so much more…

Learn more about God’s plan for your life – Click HERE.

Sharing Jokes with a Purpose is a great way to share the Gospel with your friends.

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December Joke #8

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What is the best Christmas present in the world?

A broken drum–You just can’t beat it!

You might not have a broken drum but we’ve all had a broken relationship with God.

God is perfect but we are not perfect and our sin, the wrong things we do, separate us from God.

Learn more about how God made a way to fix our sin problem – Click HERE.

Sharing Jokes with a Purpose is a great way to share the Gospel with your friends.

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Discover more jokes and Christian Resources at www.330resources.org.

 

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December Joke #7

December Jokes, , , , , , , , , , ,

Did you ever eat a clock?

It’s time consuming.

Sometimes we think we have all the time in the world but one thing is certain: None of us will live forever.

The Good News is that you can know for sure that you will go to Heaven when you die.

Learn more – Click HERE.

Sharing Jokes with a Purpose is a great way to share the Gospel with your friends.

Join us on Facebook for more jokes: www.Facebook.com/ThreeThirtyMinistries

Discover more jokes and Christian Resources at www.330resources.org.

 

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December Joke #6

December Jokes, , , , , , , , , , , ,

What do you have in December that you don’t have in any other month?

The letter “D”.

What do you have that no one else has?

Did you know that no who has ever lived has fingerprints like yours?

Did you know that nobody has ever had eyes like yours?

You are one-of-a-kind and God’s plans for you are special and unique to you.

Learn more about God’s plan for your life and how you can know for sure that you’re going to Heaven – Click HERE.

Sharing Jokes with a Purpose is a great way to share the Gospel with your friends.

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December Joke #5

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What is the difference between the alphabet and the Christmas alphabet?

The Christmas alphabet has no L (Noel).

An alphabet without an “L” is incomplete. A life without Christ is incomplete too.

Did you know that God designed you for a purpose? The Lord loves you and has great plans for your life.

Learn more about God’s plan for you – Click HERE.

Sharing Jokes with a Purpose is a great way to share the Gospel with your friends.

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December Joke #4

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While decorating Christmas cookies, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring.

The doctor said I will be fine, but I feel like I dyed a little inside.

Some people feel something different on the inside…They feel empty. But God created you for so much more.

Life is more than breathing, feeling and existing. Discover the real meaning of life and the great plans God has for you – Click HERE.

Sharing Jokes with a Purpose is a great way to share the Gospel with your friends.

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December Joke #3

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What did the gingerbread man put on his bed?

A cookie sheet.

Cookies and cookie sheet naturally go together. They’re just a perfect fit for each other.

Did you know that you were created to perfectly walk with God? But we’ve got a problem…

Learn more about our problem and how God made a way to bring us back to Him – Click HERE.

Sharing Jokes with a Purpose is a great way to share the Gospel with your friends.

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Knock, Knock – Part 2

Family Devotions - Teach Me To Pray, , , , , , , , , ,

YOU WILL NEED:

-A Bible marked at Luke 18:1-8

Tell some more “Knock, Knock” jokes. Here are some more examples:

Knock, Knock / Who’s There?
House / House Who?
House it going?

Knock, Knock / Who’s There?
Watson / Watson Who?
Watson TV?
Colleen / Colleen Who?
Colleen up your room, please.

Knock, Knock / Who’s There?
Gorilla / Gorilla Who?
Gorilla me a cheese sandwich, please.

Knock, Knock / Who’s There?
Huge / Huge Who?
Huge you expect.

Knock, Knock / Who’s There?
Yaw / Yaw Who?
Just me. Why are you so excited?

Knock, Knock / Who’s There?
Leena / Leena Who?
Leena little closer and I’ll tell you.

Read Luke 18:1-8 from your Bible.

SAY—The point of this story is NOT that God is like the grumpy guy who doesn’t want to give justice. God loves giving us good things. The point is that God wants us to be persistent—To ask and keep asking, to seek and keep seeking, to knock and keep knocking. When we pray, God doesn’t want us to give up.

ASK—Does God always answer prayer? (Yes.)

ASK—How does God always answer prayer? (God ALWAYS answers prayer in one of three ways: He answers by saying “Yes” or “No” or “Later—not right now—wait a while.” God doesn’t always answer yes, but He does always answer.)

SAY—God loves you and you can always talk to Him about anything.

ASK—What are some things that you would like to talk to God about tonight?

PRAY—Take turns praying and laying your requests before God.

This family devotion is from:

72 Family Devotions for Spiritually Training Your Kids
ON SALE for $5.99. Regular price: $9.99 USD. Nonfiction.
Featuring 72 action-packed, easy-to-lead family devotions. Set aside a night or two each week for a “special time” where you and your kids can have family fun together and learn valuable lessons from God’s Word. No advanced planning is needed. Anyone can do this. The ebook contains devotions concerning a variety of topics including salvation, fear, trust, sin, forgiveness and much more.

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